Chimera's Mayhem

crezelle:

I dunno. I think most of why I worked myself into this, is I’ve been sitting on edge 12 hours straight waiting for something to be said. A reason. An opinion. All I get is silence as they text away to someone else. My mind wanders .

A reason, an explanation, an update. Silence while they are in the same room. My mind loops and I act like an idiot. I act like an idiot and drive them away further. I drive them away.


Stupid.

I dunno. I think most of why I worked myself into this, is I’ve been sitting on edge 12 hours straight waiting for something to be said. A reason. An opinion. All I get is silence as they text away to someone else. My mind wanders .

I just got called strong. If I was strong, I wouldn’t be in this mess. I wouldn’t be flipping out like the emotional fuckwad I am. I wouldn’t be screaming on the inside, wishing I could cry one minute, then bawling my eyes out alone here. It wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t dwell on shit, letting it drive me like this.

crezelle:

I really should know better than to act like this, but I’m a social and emotional baby.

Don’t know how to copy paste here, but saying I’m strong just cause I’m not dead in a pool of blood, isn’t that high for standards. Lots of fuckups are alive still.

I just got called strong. If I was strong, I wouldn’t be in this mess. I wouldn’t be flipping out like the emotional fuckwad I am. I wouldn’t be screaming on the inside, wishing I could cry one minute, then bawling my eyes out alone here. It wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t dwell on shit, letting it drive me like this.

I really should know better than to act like this, but I’m a social and emotional baby.

kamikame-cosplay:

Awesome Bobba Fett ball gown, Photo by New Now Next.
Who knew Boba Fett was so crafty! I love how tastefully all the aspects of his classic costume have been incorporated into her cosplay, right down to what I presume is a wookie scalp purse. I’ve been unable to discover the identity of this cosplayer, (which I suppose is oddly appropriate) so if anyone happens to know who she is, please let us know so we can credit her!
Do you know who she is?

kamikame-cosplay:

Awesome Bobba Fett ball gown, Photo by New Now Next.

Who knew Boba Fett was so crafty! I love how tastefully all the aspects of his classic costume have been incorporated into her cosplay, right down to what I presume is a wookie scalp purse. I’ve been unable to discover the identity of this cosplayer, (which I suppose is oddly appropriate) so if anyone happens to know who she is, please let us know so we can credit her!

Do you know who she is?

justlookingforthespnfandom:

ullarin:

kijikun:

fiftyshadesof-ofmiceandmen:

ask-rainy-water-princess:

genocidershodan:

lemonteaflower:

anxiety.

Or, you know, you could just stop saying sorry.

I take it you don’t have anxiety.

You can’t “just stop saying sorry”. You do something, something so little, like accidentally bump into someone. You feel horrible about it. Your brain starts panicking and you have trouble trying to breathe. You stutter an apology. They say it’s okay, but you accidentally do it again, and you apologize again. They just say “Aha, you can stop saying sorry.” And you feel horrible that you’ve probably made them angry or upset, so you mutter out an apology for the third stupid time, and they just say to stop saying sorry. Stop saying sorry. 

You can’t just tell someone to stop saying you’re sorry.

I want that comment on flyers so I can hang them in my school

reblogging this one for the GOOD commentary.

If you’re going to tell someone to stop saying sorry say, “You don’t have to apologize to me.” and smile. If they say sorry again just say, “You’re fine.” and keep smiling and move on. The faster the situation is resolved the faster the person with anxiety can start to calm down. Please don’t get angry at someone for saying sorry, sometimes that’s all the person feels like they can do.

I’ve always been really bad about this and as a kid I’d always do it around my parents and my mom would always say “STOP SAYING YOURE SORRY.” thank you to the helpful comment.

This is what I get for being in denial until it’s too late.
Don’t read if triggerish.

Don’t know how to post a “read more” on mobile.
DO NOT READ BELOW IF YOU ARE TRIGGERED BY SELF HARM. I’m sorry in advance.

Broke my year long self harm free spree. Hotel razors are easy to pick apart. I done fucked up royally in the last 24 hours. Spelled out “stupid” on myself a few times in diff places. Just a little label and reminder for myself.

Have more pax pics while I sit here, half drunk and think stupid shit.

Swtor event. Force knows after all the cartel coins I bought that an open bar is a welcome sight. Also a custom Cards Against Sentience. They only made white cards, or else I would have done “why is Worms crying?”